Dr. Gary Beyer

Gary Beyer never asked “Why me?” He focused on living in the moment, appreciating the family, friends and events that brought his life tremendous joy. Throughout his life, Gary consistently showed his dedication to people, not just through the profession he chose, but also through the life he led.

1945 was a pivotal time in modern history: World War II was finally coming to an end. In the midst of this historic time, Clarence Beyer and Maxine Pritchett of Grand Rapids, Michigan were celebrating the birth of their son, Gary, on April 14 of that year.

Gary was raised by his grandparents, Albert and Sylvia “Bee” Zydor in Grand Rapids. He lived on and off with his mother, and once, at age three, “hooked a lift on a rumbling dump truck,” to see her. He was noticed and rescued by police which merited a write-up in the Grand Rapids Press. Since Gary’s grandfather was the caretaker of Richmond Park, the family, including his aunt Shirley, lived in the apartment above the park’s pool house. This made the entire park Gary’s playground, where he made many childhood memories. In the summers, when the pool was open, Gary swam in meets and helped his grandfather maintain the pool and plan activities. Gary’s hardworking attitude was especially evident one childhood summer when he arose early to ride his bike across town to caddy at a golf course before returning to once again help Grandpa Al.

Gary’s thirst for knowledge was evident early in his life. He remembered choosing to read Sigmund Freud’s “The Interpretation of Dreams” in his early teens. Gary attended Harrison Park Elementary School and then Union High School, where he played clarinet in the band and varsity football, graduating in 1963. Gary was undeterred by a high school guidance counselor’s advice to work in a factory rather than pursue college. He went on to attend Grand Rapids Junior College, Central Michigan University, Grand Valley State University and Western Michigan University, where he earned his Doctorate in Psychology in 1995.

Gary put his learning, gifts and skills to excellent use over the years as a therapist working for Allegan County Community Mental Health Services, as well as in private practice in Kalamazoo and Grand Rapids. He eventually went to work for the Michigan Department of Corrections, serving as a prison psychologist for ten years before retiring in January of 2007.

One of Gary’s many jobs in college was driving a taxi cab. He was doing this at the time of Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.’s assassination and amidst the racial unrest of the time. It was in junior college that Gary met his first wife, Valerie, and after dating for a time, they were married. The couple lived in Kalamazoo and Allegan and welcomed the births of their two children: Nicole born February 14, 1969, and Chad born March 7, 1972. The family enjoyed snow-skiing locally and in Colorado. Gary and Valerie divorced after seven years of marriage though the children remained a primary focus for Gary throughout his life.

Gary married Sally Northrup, a fellow therapist at Allegan County Mental Health, on the beach at Lake Michigan on May 29, 1976. The two shared many passions, of which psychology was only the first. At the time, Gary was finishing his Master’s at Western Michigan University so the couple settled into a home in Kalamazoo. In 1979, they moved to Jenison to be closer to Chad and Nicole. Gary loved camping with the family in northern Michigan, at Lighthouse State Park, and in Grand Haven. Favorite trips to Canada featured fishing for walleye and escaping the hassles and distractions of daily life. Gary and the children continued to snow ski together and Gary and his son Chad shared a favorite hobby of making and flying remote control airplanes. Family trips included visits with Gary’s mother and step-father, Maxine and Paul Coleman, both in Michigan and at their home in Georgia; and surprise trips each summer with Bee and Al. Gary and Sally also enjoyed cruises and vacations with Sally’s parents, Norris and Dona Northrup. Nicole’s death in April of 1996, at the age of 27, was a tragic event for the entire family.

Gary loved to play golf with his friends. He and Sally purchased land at Hawk’s Eye Golf Course in Bellaire, where they planned to build a retirement home. Gary enjoyed home remodeling and loved tile work. He was a passionate reader of a variety of subjects, but especially enjoyed the works of Noam Chomsky, a radical intellectual, and Eckhart Tolle, a contemporary spiritual teacher. Gary’s radio tastes were also broad, including humorous shows on National Public Radio and the syndicated buffoonery of “Bob and Tom”. Amy Goodman’s radio show “Democracy Now,” was a favorite for its radical challenge to the political status quo. Gary loved sharing good food and wine with friends and family, whether grilling and cooking at home or dining out.

Gary was a member of Christ Community Church (C3) in Spring Lake in the last several years of his life. At C3 he found a challenging and supportive environment in which to deepen his spiritual life and articulate his philosophy through the lens of progressive Christianity. Gary enjoyed Rev. Ian Lawton’s sermons and the discussions that followed. He valued the church men’s group where he developed powerful relationships and was appreciated for his insight.

Gary suffered from several different health ailments for many years including Crones Disease and asthma. After a car accident in 1992, he battled neurological and physical problems, underwent shoulder replacement, a spinal fusion, and countless hours of physical therapy. In May 2006, Gary was diagnosed with ALS, more commonly known as Lou Gehrig’s disease. Despite his condition, he continued to work, both because he loved the work with inmates and because he wanted to qualify for full retirement benefits for himself and for Sally. In the last weeks of his life, while home under hospice care, Gary invited nearly 90 people to visit and say goodbye; he called it a “live viewing” – classic Gary humor. Gary received love and support from these and other friends and family who stayed in touch and sent their wishes through Gary’s care page, “Ripples Of Life,” at www.carepages.com.

Gary never complained about his plight. In fact, when some people said, “This isn’t fair. This shouldn’t happen to you.” Gary replied, “Why not me?” illustrating his sensitivity to the universal experience of suffering and the universal capacity to transcend it.

Husband, father, son, psychologist and mentor, Gary lived a courageous and compassionate life. His vitality, quick wit, convictions and his belief in people’s capacity for good will live on through all who had the privilege of knowing him.

Dr. Gary E. Beyer, age 62 of Jenison, MI, passed away at his home in the presence of his loving family on Thursday, August 16, 2007, after a courageous struggle with ALS. He was preceded in death by his daughter, Nicole Beyer, his mother, Maxine Coleman, and his grandfather, Albert Zydor. Gary is survived by his wife of 31 years, Sally Beyer (Northrup); son, Chad Beyer, and partner, Matthew Cockrum; step-father, Paul Coleman; grandmother, Sylvia Zydor; aunt and uncle, Shirley and David Meyers; father-in-law and mother-in-law, Norris and Dona Northrup; many cousins and friends.

Cremation has taken place. A service to celebrate Gary’s life will be held on Saturday, September 15, tentatively at 2:00 p.m. at Christ Community Church, 1225 E. Exchange Street in Spring Lake, MI, with his pastor, Rev. Ian Lawton, officiating. Memorial contributions may be made in his memory to the ALS Association. Please visit Gary’s personal memory page at www.lifestorynet.com where you may share a memory with his family or sign the online guest book. Arrangements made by Heritage Life Story Funeral Home - Alt & Shawmut Hills Chapel.